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So the old saying goes ‘Another year, another dollar’.  Of course, that saying was started back when a dollar was a whole lot of money.  Tonight, I took a walk down the hall of the hotel I’m staying at and the soda machine said I could buy a soda if I had TWO dollars…

I just filled my bucket with ice.

Was going through all the wonderful wishes on my Facebook tonight, reading all the friends and family who took time out of their day to think of me and send me a greeting, a thought for a pleasant day.  And it was nice to think back to how I knew those people or some special memory that I had with them.  See?  I don’t fear or loathe birthdays anymore.  Getting older is a blessing.  When it’s my time to go and the Lord calls me Home, I’ll be ready.  Therefore, each birthday is a blessing.  I turned 46 on July 20th.  I’m proud of my age.  I earned each year.

What I truly enjoyed about the day, though, was the overwhelming sensation of love and general good vibrations I had today.  Sure, I was getting ready to head out on vacation, but that wasn’t the only reason.  My morning started off with a nice surprise from my manager, Carol.  She was thoughtful to give me snacks for the trip.  Goodies and a gift card to make the trip a bit easier.  Throughout the day, my co-workers were kind and pleasant, wishing me happy birthday, offering to sing.  (I really should have taken all of them up on their offers.  LOL!)

I have to say this.  The work we do is tough.  It can be frustrating and difficult at times, but I work with a GREAT group of people.  I am so blessed to have the co-workers I have.  They are amazing!

When I was finally able to sit down and read through Facebook (I did a brief scroll at lunch), one post caught my eye.  My cousin, Bobby, wished me a ‘Happy Birthday’ and then he wrote “…and Hockey-Yockey”.

Now, let me explain why this put the biggest smile on my face while at the same time made me look at all the other posts in a different light.  First, I will explain ‘Hockey-Yockey’.  There are only two certified black belts, Merine and myself.  Our fathers were our instructors.  It is our own personal, supersecret brand of martial arts.  We are the masters, we are the keepers of the great and wonderful art of ‘Hockey-Yockey’.  (It is one of the best memories of my childhood!)

That memory reminded me tonight of just how blessed I am.

And I am blessed.  I think if people stopped once in a while and truly looked at what they had… not material goods, but the ‘Hockey-Yockey’ goods… they’d realize just how blessed they were.

My mother posted how just by being born, I changed her life.  I didn’t do anything there.  No really.  At that point, I had no self-awareness.  Purely instinct driven, but look what I managed to do.  And she’s right.  Our relationship has been able to evolve from mother-daughter to that of friendship.  That’s a true blessing.

I have family relation who truly make me smile when I ‘see’ them on Facebook.  And yes, I know people say social media is the new root of all evil.  I don’t believe that.  Because of social media, I get to keep in touch with aunts, uncles, cousins… numerous people, I wouldn’t be able to ever ‘talk’ to without this particular medium.  So yes, today, I got to exchange dialogue with my Aunt Angie, who is beautiful, amazing, and funny.  I didn’t get to see her much while I was growing up, but I know she’s a very special, Christian woman.  I know I love her.  My newest cousin wished me ‘happy birthday’.  I’m excited that Krista is now my cousin.  She married my cousin Michael, and he means the world to me.  She makes him happy, and I adore her sense of humor, her personality.  I saw wishes from my cousins who live just about all over this country, aunts and uncles I don’t get to see much anymore, but I love dearly.

My Uncle Steve and Aunt June, who I would visit during the summer when they lived in Peru.  My Aunt June used to breed Yorkies.  I would get to help her with the puppies, and the momma dogs.  It was a doggie paradise at her house.  She’s also the reason my Hercules was born.  I have her to thank for the best, most precious, most wonderful gift I ever received in my entire life.  How is that for a true blessing?!

One of the neatest things was seeing posts from friends who, well, they aren’t friends.  I’m sorry.  But sometimes, people come into your life who have absolutely no blood relation and they just become family.  Renee and I were kidding around about that this morning, but it really is true.  My parents ‘gave’ me a baby sister.  In reality, though, I have so many brothers and sisters.  It’s amazing.  Truly.  I have my fire department siblings.  Some of the strongest bonds are these brothers and sisters I grew up with.  We all watched our dads (and some of us our mothers too), go out at all hours of the night and day and fight fires, save lives.  We were young when it all started, but we knew what it all meant.  Our parents went out, but someday there was the possibility that they wouldn’t come home.  It helped create a deep bond.  Something other people can’t quite understand.  And it creates great, fun, and awesome memories that are just downright funny sometimes.  Just ask Renee and Jennifer (Nettles) Carmichael about the protocols for calling about housefires.  LOL!  Cindy and I and all the hours we spend with our dads with softball… how much we all LOVED playing at Tipton.  LOL!  Jessica, Kim, Scott, Heather, Summer, Autumn… we’re all siblings.  Sisters and brothers.  My blessings grow by leaps and bonds.

Then, of course, there’s the people who just come into your life.  Ashli… God knows that I don’t know what I would do without her.  She’s my niece, through my sister, but these past two years she and I have become so close.  I don’t think she even realizes how much she’s come to mean to me. Her two daughters, Braz and Rai, are my world.  My forever soul mate, Jackie.  We met in astronomy class.  Who would have thought that would have led us to become the sisters we are today?  I certainly wouldn’t have.  Not by looking at us!!!!  LOL!  Christy, who adopted me into her entire family and made me, not only her sister, but her twin!  Another niece to love… husband… grandson… daughter…  My blessings just keep running over.

Friends from high school.  Hollis and Peggy.  These friends whom I love so very much.  I may not see as often as I want, but who ARE my sisters and brothers.  I love them, I’m thankful for them.

I don’t know if I could have made it through growing up without them.

Looking back at that, they were maybe the truest blessings of all.  Because surviving that time of your life so that you can make it to 46, man, what an accomplishment.  The Lord blessed me so much, even then.  I just didn’t realize it.

And then there’s the long distance friends.  The ones that it’s always said you ‘meet’ on the internet.  You make friends, but you never keep them because, yeah, it’s the internet.  Just typing on a screen, so how can it be a real person.  But then there’s Julie, who sent me a text and just ‘hearing’ from her made me smile because I miss her so much.  There’s Marianne, my beautiful Canadian sister who loves her crazy American sister… unconditionally.  And yes, the feeling is mutual.  There’s Debbie and her family… Brenna, Mickey, Steve, Mom, Dad, Aunt Billie… I would adopt just about the entire Stevenson family, it seems.

But again, isn’t that how it’s supposed to work.  You spend a lifetime building up these special relationships.  You make and keep these bonds that form you into who you are.  They allow you to look back on your life and smile.

Mine allow me to look back on my life and realize just how blessed I really am.  To have so many good memories and bonds.  To have so many people in my life over the long haul.  It’s just a great comfort.  And while I celebrated this ‘mid-life’ birthday today, it was nice to be able to look at these posts and think back on old memories and smile.  To be reminded that riches and wealth aren’t about the dollars that I have in a wallet or in a savings account.

No.  It’s about the blessings that God has bestowed upon me and accepting them for exactly what he intended them to be.  I’m just so thankful that I took those few moments today to stop and think and reminisce as He wanted me to do today.  That was indeed the best present I could have given to myself.  Thank you, Lord, for blessing me.

Happy Birthday, to Me.

So tomorrow is Father’s Day. Been thinking the past week about what that means, not just to me, although I really only have my own viewpoint to reference. I am so blessed to still have my father with me.  He just turned 66, and while time is beginning to win the war on the man I once believed to be Superman, I still look at him and see the hero of my childhood… my hero today.

Then again, I had many fathers growing up.  I was blessed beyond words to have many such heroes in my life.  Some have passed away and are waiting for me to join them in heaven and some are still here, still willing to help in any way necessary.

With ‘necessary’ being the key word.  See?  Fathers are different than mothers.  Mothers always pick you up, dust you off, hug you and kiss you and tell you things will be fine.  Fathers don’t always do that.  Fathers run along with you, help you pick yourself up, sure sometimes they will pick you up by themselves, but most of the time you have to do most of the work.  They don’t dust you off.  Most of the time, a lesson from my father included ‘rubbing dirt on it’.  A lesson from my Papa Dave included ‘sucking it up’.

Because sometimes, it’s the Father’s job to knock you down a peg or two.  Put you in your place.  Tell you what you DON’T want to hear.  My dad was never really gentle about it either.  Maybe he tried to be, but if there was something that needed told, he just said it.  Made us tough.

All my dads were here for that.  Toughness with love.  Because if there’s one thing I learned growing up, there was nothing in the world that compared to the love a father had for his daughter… his ‘baby’ girl.  No matter how old we were, no matter the birth position.  I saw it in all my fathers who dealt with their daughters, be it his biological daughter or one of us surrogates who he happened to adopt because, well, we were all family.

I guess this is why I’m having difficulty with this feeling that’s been washing over me lately.  Father’s Day, (my father, your father, our fathers) are every bit as important as our mothers.  Not only are they responsible for 50% of our genetic makeup and 100% of our gender, but they help shape and form our personality, sense of humor, our goals, morals, ethics, everything we grow up to become.  I have friends who have lost their fathers who have huge holes in their hearts and lives that will never be filled.  I pray for them constantly!!!!

Father’s Day is just as important a ‘holiday’, it is just as important a day of recognition as Mother’s Day.  Stop and think for a moment about where you would be without your father.  I don’t want to think where I would be without mine.  I can’t imagine going through a day like tomorrow and not honoring the man who taught me so many important values in life, who gave me my sense of humor, taught me to love sports and to drive a car.

My father is every bit as important to me as my mother is.  I pray that I never get to a point where I’m too busy, too tired, or too burdened to make my father and this day a priority.  Every father deserves that kind of respect.  My father, every father who helped to raise me, deserves that kind of respect.  And if I press myself to give it to my mother and the mothers who raised me, then I’m going to give it to my father as well.  (And yes, this includes my Heavenly Father too!)

So take some time this Sunday to thank the man who is 50% responsible for you being here and 100% responsible for your gender.  (LOL!)

And before I go, I want to leave you with some wonderful, but very important advice my father has always taught me.

Famous Quotes by Richard C. Abresch

“No matter where you go, there you are.”

BR549 is always the phone number you need.

The answer to every math question is the “square root of pi”.

“It’s colder than a well-digger’s ass.”

“It’s colder than a witch’s tit.”

“I ate a dead frog once and it didn’t kill me.”

“I’m busier than a one-armed wallpaper hanger.”

“I’m madder than a long-tailed cat in a room full of rockin’ chairs.”

“I’m busier than a one-legged man in a butt-kickin’ contest.”

(There’s also one about women of ill-repute and dollar days, but I’ll keep it clean-ish.  Hehehehe!)

“I feel like a 100 bucks.”  (This he stole from Chevy Chase, but he loves it so!)

“Doc says I’m gonna live until I die.”  (This is the report he gets from EVERY doctor visit he has!)

“Wake up and pee, the world’s on fire.”  (This is shouted as he’s banging on your door in the morning to wake you up.)

“Rub some dirt on it.”

His favorite joke:  “A Rabbi, Catholic Priest, and a Minister walk into a bar.  Bartender says, ‘What is this? Some kind of joke.”

My grandma, his mom, always shook her head and said she never understood his sense of humor.  I do, because it’s the same sense of humor I have.  My dad is the master of it.  Master of one-liners.  I could fill pages and pages with the stuff he says that just cracks me up, but these are the best.  These are the tried and true ones.  These are quirks that make a dad, a dad.

Cherish your fathers… Not just on Father’s Day, but EVERY DAY.  We only have them for a short time before our Heavenly Father calls them home.

I love you, Dad… All my dads.  I have truly been blessed by the best!!!!

 

So, our church is in the middle of a revival.  It started on Wednesday, March 2nd.  We’re on the 3rd night tonight.  Each night gets better and better.  Each night we can feel the spirit growing stronger and stronger in the church.  The message is becoming more powerful.  More souls are drawing closer to the Lord.  It’s an amazing, awe-inspiring journey.

I am overjoyed to go through it.

I almost missed it.

See? I was going to write tonight about ‘giving of myself’.  How people talk about how we give and give of ourselves until we’re tired, we’re worn and we just have no more to give.  We feel we have to distance ourselves, recharge, refocus our energy.  However we want to word it.  I get it.  I work in a job where I give of myself.  I give to people who are sick.  They don’t feel well; they have health (physical and mental) needs, and it’s my job to make sure those needs are met.  (‘I need an appointment’, ‘I need a prescription refill.’)  It’s my job to meet all those needs, in their time.  Not one or two people, but literally over a hundred of them a day.

It gets tiring.  It can wear me down.  And for a long time, I let that tiredness pull me away from the one thing I now realize I need the most in this world.  The church.

Why?  Because it helps bring me to God.

Then God began to work in me.  I didn’t realize at the time that’s what He was doing.  But I was miserable.  Anxiety, panic attacks, and self esteem issues were wearing me down.  I spent more time crying and beating myself up than I did, well, just about anything else.  Sure, I could put on the fake, happy face for the world, but inside I was dead.  Not dying, but dead.

Then God led me, and this I knew was HIS hand, to Hope Counseling Services.  It’s not a service that’s for everyone.  But it was exactly what I needed.  Faith-based counseling.  I was paired with a wonderfully spiritual woman who knew exactly what I needed, knew exactly what to say.  She never pulled a punch.  She helped me get myself through the darkness of the anxiety and panic attacks and into the light… She eventually told me to get my butt back to church.

Because, you see?  I made the HUGE mistake of trying to combat my tiredness/my weariness by refueling myself on my own.  Working constantly from the time I sat down in my seat, giving myself to others, wore me down and I totally and completely chose the wrong way to fill myself up.

I fully realized that tonight, as Brother Oley Wilson preached.  His sermon: If you don’t totally give it up, it will come back to you.  Basically, he said that if you didn’t completely let go of the things that held you back, kept you down; if you don’t totally set yourself free of your issues, they WILL come back on you.

And as I sat there, listening…  As I sat there, watching my brothers and sisters give their burdens to Christ as I had done myself… As I prayed to Jesus to take up my burdens, it came to me that I COULD HAVE MISSED THIS…

HOLY…

I could have missed it!!!!!!!!!

I could have missed one of the most amazingly awe-inspiring, soul-touching, all-encompassing meetings with the Holy Spirit I have ever had in my entire life!!!  HE TOUCHED ME!!!!

And I could have missed it had I not realized that giving of myself is what I’m supposed to do.  Being there for people, helping them… it’s my job, yes!!!  But, I also CHOOSE to do it and I ENJOY it!  I give of myself because there are people who NEED me to be there for them.  I pray for them, many times I am praying for them as they are walking out of the door.  They come to my mind at night, and I lift them up to God, asking that His Will be done for them, that he wrap them in HIS Light and touch them as only the Great Healer can. I’m supposed to be there because there are times when I know I can put a smile on someone’s face when no one else can.  (I know because I’ve been told.)

I could have missed it had I not paid attention to God telling me that I am supposed to give of myself.  I’m supposed to give as much as I do.  I should give more… NOT LESS.  I should give to family and friends.  I should give to those who need.  I should spend time with those I love, spend time with those in need, I should foster those relationships, build them, help them to grow.  It’s what we’re supposed to do… Spread the love and light of Christ!!  And I have found how to refill MY vessel.

God showed me how to refill my vessel.  HE refills my vessel.  Time spent in prayer.  Time spent with HIM.  Time (even just a few minutes) talking to Him, getting to know Him.  This is how I recharge, refill.

I realized that tonight as I was praying in the pew, my brothers and sisters around me.  I was thinking of how I could have missed it.  I could have been somewhere else… And missed it all!!!!

And I just want to thank God that I wasn’t.  I want to thank Him for making me miserable.  I want to thank Him for the anxiety and the panic attacks that led me to Dottye, my counselor, so that He could use her to open my heart and my eyes to get back where I’m supposed to be.

Because I do NOT want to MISS anything else!!!!!!

Thank the Lord!!!!!!!